sweet dreams.

patience and dedication.

both hinge on the "f" word.. faith, that is. positivity, seeing the unseen, waiting.. did i mention, waiting?
passion is something ive never lacked in. motivation becomes sparse at times, but when im there, im "there"..
believing in myself is the the easy part, having faith in others to fulfill what id refer to as "duties" (for lack of a better word)
is where i tend to fall short. ive taken the long, hard path or relying solely on self to achieve what ive accomplished thus far, but a part of me longs for people to share it with.. people that im motivated by, people that have a certain level of determination even if it has absolutely nothing to do with me or my endeavors. but truth is, people are people.. unreliable a great percentage of the time.. envious.. selfish.. easily distracted..prone to accommodate your feelings rather than give you the one inch of constructive criticism that may equal a mile worth of progress. it is within these people that i find motivation to do more, see more, be more.. but id rather receive this impetus from building upon a foundation that co-exists from people that dream.. and are willing to work hard enough to see those dreams achieved.

faith to me is an imaginary thing. faith is God.. and thats not to say in any way that God is imaginary.. but faith is a comforting thought when you're sitting in front of a computer screen and keyboard listening to melodies hours on end with equipment that hasnt garnered even a fraction of the cost you spent to acquire it.. its a drug when you dont even have enough money to afford something that would momentarily ease the stress.. its what makes you smile while you're walking down a highway, gas can in hand because you knew before you even turned the ignition that you wouldnt make it halfway to your destination..

ha, i just close my eyes and try to think how heaven feels...


i wanna live in the sky

i have a newfound infatuation with the sunset..
pics via blackberry cam.


the world is..pink?

Music was my (Intro) to this extravaganza called life. It took the place of real relationships, and although not tangible, it gave me comfort. Ive never been called a Loser(to my face..), but i can relate to the feelings of depression and angst.. It can be frustrating when She's So High and all you seem to catch are the lows.. the Voices in my head tell me the struggle is all worth it, and true enough, i see the light at the end of the tunnel from time to time, but id be the Boy Who Cried Wolf if i said id made it just because my record got a few spins.. i want people to relate.. to feel a certain way when they hear it, but substance is foreign to most.. sometimes i actually feel as if its me that wont Let Me Live, because i put unnecessary pressure on myself to break out of situations that may be just what i need at the time and i don't even realize it. I once prayed for Brighter Days.. but nowadays its for peace of mind. the type of calm that you can possess regardless of the weather. The Cookout brings a lot of familiar faces, and a lot of people you've never seen, but you realize they exist.. sorta like the Sat(t)elite's. I go back and forth in my mind with what my real goal is.. what it is that i really want to accomplish.. I want to Live Life To The Fullest, if nothing else.. but i wont ever leave her (..music..or her?) no matter how far i get away, or think about breaking the cycle, i always Come Back To You. my Latte is getting cold as i type this, but it represents one of the small joys that never gets old.. the sun is always Shinin'--whether or not it reaches you is up to choice, fate, God..which ever one you choose to believe in. All i ask is that you believe in me, believe in yourself.. and regardless of the circumstances, just know that Ill Be Around.



its been awhile but my absence from blogging doesn't mirror my progress. i've been working a lot lately.. learning more about logic.. recording, mixing, etc etc. my record collection has grown considerably.. added a bit of versatility to it with some uptempo jazz, beatles collectibles, and my newfound fav the average white band. me and j.nolan finally got a chance to get up and work on some records.. download "chasing cool" here http://tinyurl.com/qxo9pk ..4 tracks made the mixtape we're already getting a jump-start on the next project and it'll be co-produced by him also.

sorry for the hiatus but new music/videos coming soon! musicsince86 in the building..




linked only because when i embed it here, it chops a piece of the screen off.
im working on it...